Over the holidays, on December 28 2011, I lost my beloved best friend Tig. She got sick very suddenly and rapidly and she and I spent hours in the pet emergency hospital on Christmas Day but sadly she was not getting better.
This entire process took a lot out of me physically and emotionally. Not having my furbaby with me rips at my heart every single day. I was never even a fan of cats until I got Tig eight years ago and we’ve been an inseparable pair ever since. Everyone who met her loved her sweet disposition and she was most content getting her chubby little belly rubbed.
I have experienced death throughout my life – pets, strangers, family. I have experienced pain too. But I can tell you that all of those experiences, even if you were to add them up do not even come close to the pain I feel for this loss. There are lots of people, maybe more than I thought who don’t understand the loss of a pet. To “animal people” pets become family and you share a bond like no other. This loss really taught me a lot about people too. Some were there for me and shared in my sadness and helped me pull through. Sadly and surprisingly some who I thought would be were actually not that empathetic at all.
I think I really lucked out when I got Tig. She was like a teeny child that would follow me everywhere. Tig would constantly have to sit on my lap, across my stomach or want to be picked up and held like a baby. She would lick my hands and headbutt me and needed constant attention.
What I have learned most about this ordeal is the concept of unconditional love and I learned that from Tig. I hope she knows, where ever she is, that she taught me more than I can ever express and there is a piece of my heart that will carry her with me where ever I go. All my cat ever wanted was love and attention and to be surrounded with happiness. And I think we can learn from that. Tig really had it right all along; give love to get love and kindness will get you everywhere.
{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }
Tig is beautiful. I’m so sorry for your loss, and the fact that some people just don’t get it.
Dani. This is just a beautiful post. I feel for you and your loss. Pets are the most magical thing – they teach you so much about love.
Take care xo
I am so sorry you lost Tig. I can never understand people who don’t like cats (that is like saying you don’t like people, they are individuals just like we are) or understand the bond people have with their furry friends. Tig opened up your heart and that is why your loss is so great. I shed a tear with you.
I’m so sorry for your loss Dani! That is awful. I know how hard it is to lose a pet….they are your fur-children.
Virtual hugs.
I’m sorry for your loss, losing a pet is always difficult. Our family dog passed away a couple months ago and my sister told me over the phone while I was at work… I started crying in my cubicle and had to rush to the bathroom to compose myself.
As someone that was lucky enough to share some of my time with Tig, she will be sorely missed. She was a great pet and a great furry friend. Her life was so much better thanks to the love you showed her, just as yours was better for the love that she showed you. All the best in a tough time.
I can only imagine how hard this is for you. Are pets do become a part of our families and I think that its natural (albeit heartbreaking) we experience a great loss when they pass away. Those people who don’t have the connection with animals that would allow them to understand this emotion are the ones that are truly missing out! I love my cats and even though they make a mess anddrive me crazy I know that I will be terribly saddened when they are no longer with me. I hope that this is easier as time passes and that you are only left with fond memories once you have some time to heal.
Beautifully written Dani. I lost Cookie 3 years ago and I still think about him. In fact, he never really feels gone. The pain will lessen over time but you will always remember Tigs. She was such a sweet kitty. =(
so sorry about your loss Dani… we have a fur baby and I can only imagine how sad I will be when my Lewis passes. Just a quick comment about the people who you thought would be there and have maybe let you down. Having worked in the funeral industry for 10 years I have learned many things about grief and families. Many people who have experienced grief can relate or understand that loss and be there to support, while others who have never been there have a hard time. Some people are just plain uncomfortable around the raw emotions of intense sadness and will shy away from it. They just don’t know what to say, and it makes them feel uncomfortable. I am not sure if this is the case with your friends, but maybe it isn’t that they don’t really care but more they just don’t know what to say to console you. Just throwing that out there…
Thank you Lee and you are absolutely right, there is no one right way to handle death or grieving. It’s an awkward and emotional time and it is always hard to find the “right thing to say” because really there isn’t ever something that can be said to make it better. Knowing there are other people who can relate means so so much so thank you x a million!
ps. I love the name Lewis
Aww Dani, I’m so sorry to hear you lost Tigs. I never met her but she sounds like a really sweet kitty. I don’t know what I would ever do if I ever lost my kitties, Coco and Aphrodite. They really do teach you unconditional love no matter what happens. I lost someone very dear to me a few years ago so I understand the pain and gut wrenching emotions going through you. There were many times I spent the entire day crying. Here’s something that helped me during my grieving period. I hope it will help you too. ”
You don’t get over it, you just get through it. It doesn’t get better, it just gets different. Every day grief puts on a new face because we never lose people [and/or pets] we love, even to death, they continue to participate in every act, thought and decision we make. Their love leaves an indelible imprint in our memories and we just find comfort in knowing that our lives have been enriched by having shared their love.”
xo
Sorry for your loss Dani! If you ever need a big hug and some unconditional love I’m always here. xo
Danielle – This is a beautiful tribute to Tig! Our pets have a way of speaking volumns without saying anything at all! Tika has certainly entrenched herself deep in my heart and always makes me smile with her “happy dance” she does every time she greets me, whether I’m gone 2 minutes or 2 days.
Keep smiling, and let Tigs memories always be with you.
Love
Auntie Anne